Love Past Death
by Carl Price
Summary: "It was the wrong place, wrong time, wrong end of a gun"


The Crow- Love Past Death

by   
[Carlos the Bean][1] (elbeaner@hotmail.com) 

* * *

  


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------   
Take back your life, let me inside.   
We'll find a door to care-   
Better Than Ezra "Desperately Wanting"   
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Resurrection   
-Carl, get up.-   
The soft voice slides through my head like a hot knife through butter.   
"Who's there?" I ask. I look around, but all I see is darkness. Then, without warning, a cramp runs   
through my body like fire. I attempt to double up to bear the pain, but my knees bang against something hard and cold.   
-That was smart Carl.-   
That voice speaks again, but I don't pay attention to it. I'm too busy trying to figure out where I am. Thinking I'm at home in bed, I instinctively reach over my shoulder for my glasses. This time, my hand strikes the cold hard substance. I draw my hand back and feel around nervously. There is a soft pillowy cushion on all sides of me, except for on top and at my head. I feelclaustrophobia start to kick in and I panic.   
Oh christ, I think, I'm in a fucking coffin.   
"Get me out of here!!" I holler, my voice sounding weak and pathetic. I slam my hands against the   
lining of the coffin and hear the rusted hinges groan out in denial.   
-That's it boy. You almost got it.-   
"Shut up!" I snap at the voice. "Where are you?" I punch the coffin's ceiling with both hands. The   
piece lifts off of the bottom and dirt starts to fall into the coffin. Black earth falls into my eyes and I shake it away, not caring.   
-I'm right above you Carl. I'm waiting for you. I have something I need to show you.-   
I punch at the coffin again and smile as the piece moves farther up. I laugh madly and more dirt falls into the coffin, right into my mouth. Yummy.   
-Use your legs. You always brag about how strong they are.-   
"Bite me," I hiss.   
I draw my legs up to my chest carefully and kick out. I watch the coffin's top piece explode through six feet of dirt and sail into the darkness.   
"YES!!! EAT THAT!" I shout into the darkness and sit up.   
-Sorry boy, that lid isn't in my taste. I prefer swiss amaretto. Uh- oh, here comes a cramp.-   
Right on the voice's cue, I double over as I feel like someone shoved a red-hot poker into my body. As I'm doubled over, I see something from another life. My life. My past. I'm 

(Handing a woman a large diamond ring. Her eyes light up, though her face is shrouded by darkness) (A gun pointed at me, another shadow- figure holding it) ("Eat that...") (A burning pain in my chest) (My shirt is on fire) ("Help me... please...") 

I scream out in agony as the visions fade out. I weakly rise to my feet and can just see over the ground level.   
"What was that?" I ask, holding my arms across my chest to stop the shivering I seem to be suffering from.   
-A flashback. Alot like when you're on acid, but these are much more powerful. They're actual   
memories you had.-   
"What causes them?"   
-Anything. A sight, a smell, a sound. In your case, a phrase.-   
Without knowing, I flip out of the hole in the ground and land in a squatting position.   
"Where are you?" I ask again. I look around and see only hundreds of headstones. On top of a headstone three down from me, there is a large bird. A large black crow, to be exact. The crow takes wing and flies towards the headstone closest to me. The design of the granite is that of an angel stretching his   
(hers?) arms towards heaven.   
-You might want to get ready for a shock, Carl. Touch here.-   
I place my hand on the stone and feel electric energy charge through me as a flashback hits me. 

(Walking down a hallway with a trenchcoat slung over my shoulder. I feel happy as I'm walking and stop at a closed door. I place my hand on the knob and turn slowly. Peeking my head through the   
opening, I see the woman lying in bed asleep. The silk covers are pulled up to her chin. I feel love. A powerful emotion that makes me smile. I walk into the room and sneak over to the bed. I kiss the woman on the forehead and hold my hand over her body. She opens her eyes and looks at me. All I can see is the crystal blue of her irises through the shadow covering her face.)   
("My prince," she whispers, "you came to me." I slowly drag the sheets over her naked body and hear her sigh as the cover goes across her hips. I let her help me undress and climb into bed beside her.) 

A strange combination of love, fear and sadness washes over me as I watch the flashback of me   
making love with this woman. I try to pull my hand back, but I can't. I can only watch and grow sick to my stomach. 

(As we make love, the woman and I hold each other close and sit facing each other. The woman   
touches my face with one hand as she runs her other hand over my penis.)   
(I love you Carl, the woman says as she massages me. I inhale with pleasure and shut my eyes. When I opened my eyes, I saw a huge shadow-figure dressed in black standing behind the woman. The figure placed a gun to the woman's head and pulled the trigger. The woman's blood and brains splash across my face. I scream at the figure. The happiness is gone from me as I look at the shadow-figure and scream madly. I cannot tell what the words are, only that they are angry and filled with hatred. The shadow pulls away from the figure's face and all I see is a huge, grinning skull.)   
-It's hell, isn't it, kid? Hope you got your tickets ready for a long ride, heh heh-   
"Shut up," I say queasily as another flash hits me.   
-This is taking too long, Carl. It is time to remember what happened.-   
------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
- It was the wrong place, wrong time, wrong end of a gun-   
Concrete Blonde "God Is A Bullet"   
------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
-   
Surfacing   
-   
Five souls: one couple, two friends, one crush. They are all in a band together, Angels of Dissidents. They were best friends, family and lovers. Micah Armour, constantly in trouble, constantly being bailed out by his cousin, Carl Price. There was also Micah's love interest, Selena Rodriguez. She and Micah could never be seperated, they were the couple. 'Blue' Sylvester was the friend to Carl, the two had known each other since childhood, and could always make the other laugh. Next, there was Joleen Luke, the object of Carl's affections. To Carl, she was beautiful. Her long legs, mid-length soft brown hair and thin, athletic body enticed him every time that he looked at her. He always dreamed about lying next to her body at night, and every song that he wrote was for her.   
Finally, there was Carl Price. He was their unofficial leader, and the one that each person trusted   
with every secret they had. He was an avid martial artist and fencer, so he was in great shape. Whenever their band gave a performance, he was always the most active; dancing on stage with the other members and sometimes with people in the audience.   
Now, three of the five friends, Micah, Selena and Blue, sat in an Italian restaurant called Sarnelli's,   
where Carl and Joleen both met and worked. Ironically, it was those two that the three were waiting on.   
Their wait wasn't long. When the three just got settled in, Carl and Joleen walked through the   
restaurant doors and joined them at a table in the back. Blue was the first to notice a big smile on Joleen's face as Carl pulled a chair out for her.   
"Thanks, Beaner," Joleen whispered, using her nickname for Carl. Carl slid Joleen's chair in and sat   
down beside her. He took her hand up to his mouth and kissed it softly.   
"You're welcome, Elfling," Carl said back, using his nickname for Joleen. The two looked across the table to Micah and Selena. Micah smiled knowingly at his cousin.   
"I take it that I'm the only single person sitting here at this table, huh?" Blue asked dryly. The other   
four nodded in agreement. Blue took a quick look at Selena and smiled wickedly.   
"Hey, Selena," he said, trying to hide the smile, "you wanna have sex wit' me? Make me feel like I'm wanted?" Selena busted into a fit of laughter and shook her head quickly.   
"Blue, you're wanted," Joleen said softly, "just not by anyone here."   
Blue put a hurt face on and started to feign crying. Carl started to pat his shoulder in comfort.   
"There, there. There, there," Carl said without emotion, sending the entire table into hysterics...   
The five finished their meal and left the restaurant. As they walked down the street, the two couples hand-in-hand and Blue in the middle, Carl cast a glance at Joleen and smiled at her crookedly. This action showed off a deep dimple in his cheek, and that made Joleen blush with joy. Still smiling, Carl leaned over and lingered around Joleen's long neck.   
"After we take the others home, you want to stay at my place?" he asked politely. Joleen sighed at   
the warmth of his breath against her neck and smiled.   
"I'd love to, but..." she paused, "I have to get up early for work."   
Carl thought in a flash how to solve that problem, "Call and tell your boss you're having car troubles." Joleen giggled at the idea.   
"We've only been a couple for three hours, and already you're thinking up lies for me," Joleen   
laughed, "I don't know what to say."   
"Say yes," Carl suggested, "or a tleast say hello." The kiss he recieved from Joleen was enough of an answer to him.   
"I'll take that as a yes," he whispered. Joleen squeezed his hip tightly and placed her head on his   
shoulder.   
"Hey, guys," Micah said softly, "hang on, I hear something." He left Selena and the others and darted down a sideroad.   
"MICAH!!" Selena shouted as loud as her tiny body could allow. She started after him, but felt   
someone holding her back. She swung and kicked wildly, and finally caught Blue right square in the balls. He dropped like a rock, cupping his nuts in his hands. She started after Micah again and was caught again. This time by Carl, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't nail him with a single hit.   
"Lemme go, essé!!" Selena shouted loudly. "Lemme get my boyfriend!"   
"Not yet Selena," Carl whispered soothingly, "not just yet." Selena spun around nimbly in Carl's arms and tried to scratch his face. The black belt first degree deftly blocked the attack and pinned Selena's arm between their bodies.   
"Let me go!" she screeched loudly. "You think you know me, púnta?"   
Carl placed a hand over Selena's mouth and shooshed softly.   
"No Selena, I don't know you," he answered calmly, "but I do know my cousin. He'll stay alive for   
five minutes and try to stall whatever's going on. I know he'll do that, because he does that all the time. After five minutes, we'll all go and see if Micah's okay."   
"What if something happens to him before then?" Selena asked, tears of defeat welling in her eyes. She was turning on all her weapons to get her way, and it was working. She saw Carl pause in thoughtand seethe through his teeth.   
"Alright, we'll go now," he hissed. He let go of Selena and looked back at Blue.   
"Blue, you take up the back," he said with the confidence of a born leader. "Selena, you're in front of Blue. Joleen, you get behind me, and I'll take lead. If I say run, you run, don't ask any questions, okay?" The three nodded in agreement and followed Carl as he walked down the alleyway. After what seemed like an eternity of walking, Selena screamed in horror, or fear, or both. Carl stopped walking and held his hand up to signal silence. Up ahead of them on the side of the road, just before a bridge, was a parked van and a cluster of people. It looked like the people were kicking something, or someone.   
"How many boss?" Blue asked, trying to add some light-heartedness to the situation.   
"Ssh," Carl hissed. He opened his hand once, shut it, then raised one finger. Six people.   
"Where's Micah?" Selena shouted out loudly. She looked back at the others, muttered something in   
Spanish, then ran towards the six people at the far end of the road.   
"Shit," Carl muttered, taking after Selena and leaving Joleen and Blue to follow.   
The three ran down the road and took their eyes off the six people for only one instant. Long enough for a muffled gunshot to ring out and hear a woman's scream.   
"Fuck this silent treatment," Carl hissed as he broke into a full speed run. Leaping into the air, Carl   
spring-boarded off one of the gang- members and tackled another. The seventeen year old fell into a dark rage as he pummeled the gang-member into the ground. He was prepared to deal the final blow when he heard a familiar voice behind him shout.   
"Well, I'll be damned! It's my little Irish friend Slash!" the voice continued in a lighter tone. "You   
really ought to stop beating the shit out of that rookie Slash, I got to show you something." Carl rose to his feet, letting the beaten and bruised rookie crawl away. He stared at the Egyptian gangleader he once served   
"What do you got Rajeem?" Carl asked coldly. The man spoke again.   
"A very pretty girl that you don't want hurt, Slash." Carl spun around and saw Joleen being held by a heavy-muscled, bald, black man.   
"Let Joleen go, Rajeem," Carl demanded. "You don't need her. I know all you want is me." He   
never saw the one gang-banger walking up with a lead pipe.   
"Ya know I can't do that Slash," Rajeem said sadly. "One more thing, goodnight." Right on cue, the   
banger behind Carl struck him with the lead pipe, knocking him unconscious...   
When Carl woke up, he found his hands tied behind his back and his legs tied to a chair. His head   
throbbed loudly as he turned and saw Joleen and Blue tied to chairs on each side of him.   
"Glad to see that you came around before I killed you, Slash," Rajeem said merrily, his proud voice   
ringing. "Unfortunately, you woke up too late to save your woman from li'l Rajeem." Carl surged forward against the chair and wound up falling onto the floor at Joleen's feet. He looked up and saw tears streaking her bruised face.   
"I'm sorry," she whispered harshly. Carl looked deeper into her eyes and nodded.   
"It wasn't your fault, Joleen," he said as Rajeem hoisted him up and slammed the chair onto the floor.   
"How touching, Slash," Rajeem whispered, looking into Carl's eyes. He whistled loudly and two   
masked people, one man and one woman, walked into the room. They were dressed all in black; long sleeved tight shirts, leather pants and black cloth masks. They joined the rest of Rajeem's crew: Skinpuppy, Tiger, Boo Bear, Monkeyboy and Monster.   
"Hey, hey, the gang's all here," Rajeem said happily when he saw the masked people. He walked   
over to the people and placed his arms around their shoulders.   
"Slash, since you left, I decided to add a couple of new people to my happy little family. I call them   
my Executioners. I have known them since my childhood. They are my brother and my sister. Not literally of course, but spiritually."   
"We are good at what we do," the male Executioner's muffled voice said, pulling out a straightrazor   
and dancing it over his gloved fingers.   
"I know that voice," Blue said. "I swear that has to be... UUNNHHH!!" Blue's revelation was cut   
short by six quick deafening gunshots. The female Executioner slid a large .45 caliber pistol into a holster and looked at Blue's bullet-riddled corpse.   
"Adíos, víejo," the female whispered. Joleen's face lit up in anger and recognition.   
"You mother-fucking cunt!!!" Joleen shouted, right before the female Executioner shot her in the   
lung. The force of the impact knocked her back onto the floor. Carl watched in horror as she hit the ground with a sickening thud.   
"Carl..." Joleen whispered, blood running out of her mouth and towards her ears, resembling a greusome smile."Help me.... please.... help me..." Rajeem cut the bonds on Carl's legs and let him fall to Joleen's side.   
"Joleen, stay with me baby," Carl whispered, placing his hand on her wound, trying to stop the   
bloodflow.   
"Carl... I love you..." Joleen said painfully, "I... want you... to.. kiss me..." Tears of pain and rage ran down Carl's face as he kissed Joleen for the last time. He felt Joleen's hands around his neck loosen   
and fall to the floor ungracefully. Carl drew back from Joleen and looked at Rajeem and the Executioners. Joleen's blood was transposed onto his anger ravaged face, the tears and blood forming a dark version of the Mask of Joy.   
Without a word, Carl lept across the floor and kicked the female Executioner in the face, knocking   
her to the floor.   
"DON'T YOU EVER HIT MY WOMAN!!!" the other Executioner shouted, swinging at Carl with the straightrazor. Carl felt a painful prick as the blade passed through his neck, severing his arteries and   
voice box. There was a loud explosion as Rajeem shot him in the chest one time.   
"Fucker," Carl hissed, instead sending a spray of blood into the Executioner's face in a   
noiseless gasp. Carl took a staggering step forward at the man as his lifeblood spilled across the   
floor.   
Even as the darkness closed around him, the seventeen year old swung at the Executioner and fell onto the floor. The last thing that he saw was Joleen's pale blue eyes staring at him lifelessly.   
His final thoughts were to a God that he didn't have faith in... "Don't let them get away with this. I   
don't want them to walk the streets without justice...."   
------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
Mama take this badge from me,   
I can't use it anymore   
Bob Dylan "Knockin On Heaven's Door"   
------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 

-   
Dust N' Bones   
-   
I lay there on the ground for what seemed an eternity, the night air freezing my body all the way   
through. I finally muster the strength to look up and see the crow is still there.   
"What now?" I ask in a voice as soft as the breeze.   
-Follow me. We have to get you ready-   
The crow takes off into the night sky and flew into the darkness, an angel in black on black. Instinctively, I follow the crow, first at a slow staggering pace that graduated into a long, steady run. I hear music in my head as I run down the street and nimbly leap over anything in my way.   
"Breathe in, Breathe out, Breathe in," I hear myself sing. I keep my pace in time with the music as I follow the crow. The bird flies down a dirt road and hangs a tight left. Without a pause, I turn the corner and tail the bird. I slow down on purpose, because I know the road the crow took me down. I walk the road to nearly the end and take a right at a large beige house. The security light to my house (when I was alive) turned on and I could hear my parents' dogs barking in warning.   
I duck behind one of our cars until the light shut off and then make my way into the house. When I step into the house, I look around and get assaulted by flash after flash of my former life. 

(Standing in the kitchen making Joleen a special dinner before we meet the others) (Taking an ex-girlfriend by the hand and leading her down the hallway to my bedroom) (The biggest argument with my parents I ever had, about a girl that I was dating) 

Aware of the risk of more flashes, I walk into the living room and fall down on the floor. Another   
flash hits me 

(Waking up to Tya, our Great Pyrenees, licking my face) 

I get up off the floor and look over at the couch on the side wall. I see that someone is sleeping on it, but I can't tell who it is. That is, I can't tell who the person is until she rolls over and faces me.   
"Laurie?" I whisper. She wakes up and stares me dead in the face, not believing her eyes. She rubs her face and a look of recognition strikes her.   
"Carl?" she says back, shocked. I stagger forward and embrace her in my arms. Flash 

(The night I lose my virginity. A look of pleasure is on Laurie's face as she rides me to her first or   
second orgasm. Finally, she collapses into my arms and breathes against my neck.) 

"Is it really you?" Laurie asks. I nod and kiss her on the lips. She kisses me back and I tense up,   
waiting for a flash that doesn't come.   
"What was that all about?" she asks, noticing my tension. I pull away from her and look into her   
eyes. They are still a beautiful shade of brown, but they seem to be more mature than when we broke up. There's something else about her too, but I can't place it right away.   
"There's something I have to tell you Laurie," I whisper. "It's going to be hard to believe also..." Laurie cuts me off with a kiss.   
"Tell me later," she breathes against me, "for now, just hold me." I reach out to take Laurie in my arms and then let go of my emotional controls. I cover her face with kisses and crawl beside her on   
the couch.   
We make love that night for our second time with each other. All the while, I am hit with flashes of   
times that I was with Laurie...   
I wake up and reach for Laurie, but she isn't there. I look outside the living room and see the sun   
setting.   
How could it be dusk, I think, I just went to sleep about three hours ago.   
-Time passes at different speeds, now that you are chosen. Sometimes, it will pass slower, and other times it will pass quicker-   
"Of all the people to be stuck with I die and I'm stuck with a fucking cryptic rat with wings," I mutter coldly. I get up and walk thru the house, constantly barraged with flash after flash of my former life. 

(Max, a Newfoundland/golden retriever halfbreed, pouncing me and holding me to the ground while four chihuahuas lick my face at once.) (In the kitchen, doing push-ups with my nephew sitting on my back) (My road hound, Kimi, licking my face while I'm lifting weights) 

I smile at these memories and find Laurie in what used to be my room. She has her back to the door and is holding something in her arms. She turns around and looks at me. In her arms is a tiny baby girl that looks exactly like her. Laurie looks at me and smiles crookedly. At the same time, I am filled with sadness and joy.   
"I wanted to tell you last night," she said. I hold my hand up, silencing her.   
"I... I understand, Laurie," I whisper, sorrow choking my voice, "you met another guy." Laurie shakes her head and smiles.   
"No, Carl," she says, "I haven't found anyone as good as you since we broke up. Do you remember   
that night in the car last year?" I nod. "Well, this is your daughter, Joleen Nicole Price. I figured I   
might as well honor you and the girl that I lost you to." She hands me the baby and covers the breast that   
she was nursing the baby with.   
"I have a daughter?" I said, not believing the tiny body I held in my hands. Finally, it hits me, "I have a daughter."   
"I'm going to take a shower, Carl," Laurie says, "I'll let you get acquainted with your daughter."   
Laurie walks out of the room and shuts the door behind me.   
-WHAT ARE YOU DOING???   
I look up and see the crow resting on the baby's crib. It ruffles its feathers and looks dead at me.   
"I have a daughter," I answer. "This is my baby girl. This is Joleen. My blood."   
-Don't do this, Carl. The last one that got reacquainted with his past lost his love-   
"What do you mean 'last one'?" I ask. Joleen squeezes my finger as tight as she can. She doesn't   
know what I am, she can only feel the love that I have for her.   
-There was one before you that left a child and a girlfriend. His killers found out and took his girlfriend from him-   
"Before me? You mean that there were others?"   
-Hundreds before, hundreds after, hundreds now. All of them have a watcher. The watcher is   
someone that was close to them. Sort of like a guardian angel   
"Joleen? Is that you?" I ask the crow.   
I think to myself, Great, I'm talking to a fucking bird. I'm dead and I'm talking to a bird, what next?   
-You don't have to talk to me Carl, I can hear your thoughts. And no, I'm not Joleen. You wouldn't   
know who I was if I told you. But there is one thing I can tell you; If you work for the living, you   
bleed like the living-   
"You're telling me I have to leave Laurie again?" I snap. That moment a picture falls down and   
shatters on the crib. A shard of glass embeds itself into my arm, drawing blood. I hear the shower turn off and Laurie runs into the room, wearing only a towel she's holding around her body.   
"Shit! What happened in here?" she asks, looking at the blood running down my arm. (I guess dead   
men do bleed, huh?)   
"A picture fell down and broke on the baby's crib," I answer, "I guess a piece of glass got into my arm." I hand Laurie the baby and walk into the bathroom.   
"Okay," I whisper, "how do I get this out? It hurts like hell." The crow appeared on my shoulder and (I swear it did this) shrugged.   
-You were working for the living just then. You have to focus on your quest. What was the reason   
you came back?   
It hits me hard and fast: "Revenge, but..." I start. I hear Laurie's voice across the doorway.   
"Are you okay Carl?" she asks. I open the door and invite her into the bathroom. She steps in quietly and looks at my arm.   
"God, that looks terrible," she says, "you need to see a doctor." I shake my head slowly and look at   
the floor.   
"Laurie, weren't you curious where I was for the past year?" I ask. Laurie nods and then reaches out to me. I shrug away from her touch and grab the glass that's sticking in my arm.   
-Focus on your purpose.   
Flashes galore   
( memories and images of my short, blessed/tragic time with Joleen rip through my mind) (Her touch, her smell, her feel) (the look of shame in her eyes when Rajeem reveals he raped her) (The look of understanding and acceptance of her death)   
I grit my teeth against the pain that seems to be dulling and pull the glass out of my arm. Then,   
slowly, the blood starts to flow backwards into the wound. Finally, the wound seals itself shut without a hint of a scar. Laurie's face goes ashy pale and I catch her moments before she falls.   
"Laurie, I've been dead for god knows how long," I explain, "I don't know who or what brought me back, or how I was brought back to life, but I know why. I came back to kill the people that took my life, and the life of my friends. I guess I'm part of something very big and powerful and revenge-happy."   
"How did you die?" she asks. I can tell she is afraid of the answer. It shows in her eyes.   
-Show her, Carl   
I reached forward and touched Laurie's face softly with one hand, then the other. Together, we   
watch as my friends and I are murdered by a gang that I once belonged to, the Roman Angels. I also see, thru her eyes, my funeral, my parents' grieving and hugging Laurie.   
I let go of Laurie and stay away from her as she recovers from the flash.   
"I can't stay here Laurie, I have to go."   
She nods weakly, understanding me and takes my hand apprehensively. She leads me through the   
house into the attic and over to a large dresser. I open the dresser and pull out the clothes that I wore when I was an Angel of Dissidents. A short sleeve turtle-neck shirt, tight black jeans and a pair of shiny black jungle boots.   
"I always had dreams that you would come back for me," Laurie said as I changed out of the   
ceremonial pants and into my uniform of death. I look at myself in the full length mirror and smile thinly. My visage of revenge was not complete. I search the dresser and find a set of Halloween make-up. White basepaint and black lipstick. I find a black eyeliner pencil and outline my lips. I draw thin lines over my eyes and outline the sockets. A pair of lines run down from the outline to just above my lips. I start to draw lines from my lips that run up to my ear-level. As I paint my Mask of Joy, I am hit with the most painful flash so far.   
(Joleen, lying on the floor in a pool of blood. Blood streaking her face from her mouth to her ears.)   
I look in the mirror and see both our faces, one over the other. Hers a face of deathly calm and pain, mine a face of dead calm and endless rage   
"I have to go Laurie," I say, "meet me at the docks to St John's at dawn. Bring Joleen." I write out a quick note and hand it to Laurie.   
"Give this to my parents, the next time you see them." I head towards a window, grab my black   
duster, and leap out of the attic. I run thru the woods, following the crow again, not caring where it took me.   
"Who's first?" I ask as I run down the street to the town that I swore I would never die in, but somehow did.   
-Someone that you trusted with your life, and took it away from you-   
I follow the crow across town until it reached a large Mexican style hotel. I know the name of it   
instantly, Qui Sé Sana, Here Is Health. I made a mental note to change the name to Qui Sé Muerté, Here Is Death.   
-Su Espanol es no bueno, amigo-   
"Shut the hell up," I whisper, walking thru the hotel. I have never been in this hotel, but I know exactly which turns to take to reach the room that I need to go to. I push the door open and see a large broadsword over the fireplace. I grab the sword and scabbard and attach it around my chest. I hear a shower running in the background. Going against everything my rage is telling me, I bide my time. I pull the drapes shut in the room and turn out all the lights, casting the room in total darkness as I take a seat in a bare cushioned chair. The occupant of this room left a cigarette burning for me. How sweet. The shower turns off and a man steps into the room, a towel wrapped around his waist. He sees me and jumps back in shock.   
"SHIT!" he screams. "You scared the hell outta me!" I recognize him immediately. My cousin,   
Micah. A person I trusted. The person that killed me. I gave the bird some credit on this one.   
I decide to be playful a bit before I kill him, so I mimic a gameshow host.   
"Let's welcome our contestant," I say in a Chuck Woolery-esque voice, "he's a chicken shit, nutless bastard who murdered his cousin and friends... Let's welcome Micah Armour!" I rise from the chair and pop my neck loose. "Time for Round One, Micah: Remember who you killed? Who was the last person to see death come by your hand? Was it Joleen Luke? Blue Sylvester? Or.... was it your cousin, Carl Price, who-happens-to-be-standing-before-you-right-now-even-though-he's-been-dead-for-awhile?"   
"You're dead man," he whispers. I noticed a dark stain spreading across the towel. "I-I-I-I I saw   
you die. You tried to take a swing at me even when you were dying. You're dead, I know it." I stand up and unsheath the sword.   
"You betrayed me, Micah," I whisper sadly. I fake a thrust at my cousin and watch him jump in   
terror.   
"You took my life," I continue, slamming the sword into the floor and slowly moving towards Micah.   
My cousin picked up a table and threw it at me. Without thinking about it, I fired my fist out,   
smashing the table to bits.   
"Real friggin smart, Micah," I comment. He tries to fake me out before running across the room. But, with my death-given powers (that I was still finding out about), I know his actual destination before he   
could reach it. I grab Micah in my hands and fling him across the room. He slams into the wall and falls   
to the floor. I walk over to him and kneel down.   
"Micah," I say coldly, "I'm very disappointed in you. You were my family, my blood. But you   
betrayed that, when you killed me." I grabbed the sword and leveled it at Micah's chest.   
"Don't kill me, Carl," Micah blubbers, "I don't want to die."   
"You don't want to die?" I ask in mock sympathy. I pull the sword back and let Micah rise to his   
feet.   
"My cousin doesn't want to die," I say in mock confusion, swinging the sword limply in my hand, "I didn't want to die, Micah, neither did Blue. And you know who else didn't want to die?"   
"Who?" Micah asks. I turn my head and look over my shoulder at him. I smile darkly and look into   
his soul as I pull down the turtle-neck. He stares in horror at the scar on my throat.   
"NEITHER DID JOLEEN!!!" I scream madly, swinging the sword at Micah's neck. The sword   
blade is alot thicker than the razor that he used on my neck and his head flies across the room. A look of disbelief and horror is still on his face as his disembodied head rolls across the floor.   
"Watch your step to hell, Micah... It's a long fall," I whisper, starting to leave the room.   
-Don't forget a mark to show you were here-   
"Oh, yeah, sorry," I laugh maniacally. I dip my hand in Micah's blood and paint a large crow on the   
wall in arterial red. I sheath the sword and walk out of the hotel.   
"What's next?" I ask, standing against the doorway of the hotel. The crow rests on my shoulder and   
caws loudly.   
-Rajeem's little generals are all at the crack house on Middleburg Avenue. We can get this done quickly or slowly. Up to you-   
"Good for them," I mutter darkly. I walk down the street with my eyes downcast. I know where I'm going, the bird knows where I'm going. I'm going to get a ride.   
I walk into a used vehicle lot and head straight for the motorcycles. Before I died, I wasn't really hot on motorcycles. Now, it's a whole other story. I am spotted by the last salesman at the lot. He's locking the doors to the office when he spots me.   
"Can I help you sir?" he asks, walking up to me.   
"I'm looking for a bike," I answer calmly. The salesman looks me up and down, sizing me up. His   
gazes pauses at the large, sheathed sword on my back and then moves on, only to stop at my painted face.   
"I'm a student at Florida School of the Arts... Theater Major," I comment casually. The salesman nods his approval and starts to tell me about the motorcycle I stopped at.   
"This model is a very smooth ride sir," he says, all cheesy-like and corny. "In my opinion, it would   
make a good motorcycle for you.... I have one question though, sir. Are you looking for a soft, quiet   
ride, or a loud smooth ride?"   
"Well, for what I'm doing, quiet might be better," I say. The salesman's face drops.   
"Then this bike might not be the one for you," he comments. "If I may be so bold to offer...." I hold my hand up and cut him off.   
"Just fire this bad boy up and let me decide," I tell him. I see flashes of green in his eyes as he sticks   
the keys in the ignition and fires the engine. When I first hear the cherry-bombed exhaust throbbing madly, I start to back away, but some supernatural force led me towards this bike, and I intend to follow it, having been a very superstitious person. I hop on and revved the engine a few times, listening to the Exhaust System of the Gods blast off shot after shot of engine waste.   
"I'll take it," I say loudly over the noise. The salesman looks at me and smiles widely.   
"You want to discuss payment options?" he says. I shake my head one time and rev the engine as far as it will go. I throw the kickstand up and take off on the motorcycle into the darkness.   
-Do you know where you're going to?   
"Yep," I answer quickly, "I know."   
I fly thru the night until I come within sight of my destination. A large, elaborate mansion on the   
outskirts of town. None of the cops know that the mansion doubles as a crackhouse and whorehouse, but everyone else does. Tonight, however, it comes to an end.   
I shed the bike in the darkness and walk up to the crack- house's front door. Calmly, I knock on the door three times as hard as I can. A cubbydoor swings open and I see a large, dark and bald head peek out. I smile as discreetly as possible at Monster, Rajeem's personal bodyguard, and the soon to be dead man that touched Joleen.   
"Who the fuck are you?" Monster shouts at me.   
"Domino's Pizza," I answer, disguising my hatred as well as I can, "I have a delivery for your boss." Monster slams the door in my face and locks it. I knock three times on the door again. I hear good ole Monster shout something unintelligible and open the cubbydoor again.   
"What the fuck... you again?" he snaps. "Who the fuck are you, man?"   
"I'm the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown," I answer, looking up at the huge brutha in front of me, "I've come to give out presents to all the good little children of the world. And you know what, Monster?"   
"What?" he asks. I whip out the sword and cut through the door hinges.   
"You and Rajeem's posse have been very bad this year," I reply, kicking the door in and knocking   
Monster to the floor. I walk casually into the biggest room of the mansion, my duster wrapping around my legs and whipping out behind me. All the crack-heads and hookers stare at me, looks of fear and disbelief across their faces.   
"We're going to play a game," I say loud and animated to the crowd. "I will ask a question, and   
anyone here who knows the answer, will tell me."   
"Man, Mr. Make-up," Monster said as he pushed the huge wooden door off his body. "You are one   
fucked up innavidjul"   
I look at Monster over my shoulder, "You dunno the half of it."   
Back to gametime with the crowd. I hold my arms out-stretched and pop my neck loose, "Tonight's Final Jeopardy question is: Where is Rajeem?"   
Monster pulls out a Dostovei .45 and points it at me. "I think you betta leave Mr. Make-up. B'fo I   
blow yo head off yo shoulders." I place the palm of my hand on the end of the Dostovei and look at the seven foot tall man in front of me.   
"You know I hate guns Monster," I whisper, slowly unsheathing the sword. "They lack that... personal touch." I fall backwards and swing the sword up, cutting thru the gun with ease. That's   
when all hell broke loose...   
----------------------------------------------------   
Right Next Door To Hell   
----------------------------------------------------   
The first thing that I remember happening is several people shooting me in my body. I stagger back   
from the impacts and instinctively grab the wound. I drop my hand away and show the bullet wounds to all in the room.   
"Naughty, naughty," I hiss as the wounds slide shut. "Children shouldn't play with guns." At that, I leap into the crowd, my sword lashing out at anything in my way. I have several destinations; Skinpuppy, Tiger, Boo Bear, the Executioner and finally, Rajeem.   
I see Skinpuppy across the room, behind several people firing high powered automatics. I feel a   
bullet rip thru my shoulder.   
"Ouch," I whisper, flipping the sword backwards and ramming it behind me. A scream of agony   
satisfies me and I rip the sword out. I head towards the automatic carriers, heedless of the bullets violating my body. Skinpuppy sees me and pushes his way forward, smiling darkly. He's strapped with a sawed-off shotgun. Not like it would help.   
Without a word, I cut him off at the knees, then slam the blade into his chest. Dead as a doornail,   
just like me. More bullets rip thru my flesh as I continue across the room. A poor soul sporting an Uzi gets in my path, and I send him to Valhalla without his intestines.   
"WHO'S NEXT???" I scream, feeling my adrenaline rise. I hear several more shots and I smile insanely.   
"Guess it's all fair game from here."   
I pick the Uzi up and start spraying across the room, taking out whoever gets in the way. When the   
clip is emptied, half the people in the room are dead. Miraculously, Monster, Tiger and Boo Bear are still alive.   
"I guess you four are next," I whisper, feeling my flesh tightening around the bullet holes.   
I can feel the crow's presence outside the door. -Take them out Carl. Rajeem is close.   
"Tiger," I say with contempt, "you aren't even worthy of that street name. You're first, I guess." I set the sword on the ground and push it to the side. I beckon for Tiger to step forward. The tall Asian meets   
me on the floor and takes his fighting stance. I stand there, arms to my side, trying not to laugh.   
"I know guns can't hurt you," he says, "but maybe fists can." He throws the first punch, which I   
dodge easily.   
"Try again," I challenge, "harder." He throws out several punches and a few kicks. I block most of   
the attacks, but let one or two slip thru, just to build his confidence.   
"I was always faster than you," Tiger says softly as he continues to attack me. "You could never beat me when you were Slash. And you can't beat me now." He fires out a spin kick, and I grab his foot   
an instant before it connects with my head.   
"Betcha I can, pumpkin," I whisper, pushing is foot away. He is thrown off balance by my move. I take this time to launch my attack. I go into a frenzy as I pound Tiger into a pulp, and when I knock him onto the ground, I pause for a moment.   
"Finish...." Tiger groans. A wicked smile across my face, I step on his arms as hard as I can, grinding the bones into dust.   
"Hey, look who finally made it!!!" an energetic voice calls out behind me. I know who it is without   
even looking.   
"Where were you Rajeem?" I say, looking down at Tiger, who was so far into shock, he couldn't   
feel the pain. "I've been waiting." I walk over to my sword and pick it up. A gun goes off and I turn around. I see the female Executioner holding a still-smoking .45 over Tiger's corpse. 

("You mother-fucking little slut!") (the gun pointed at Joleen) (Her body flying backwards and   
landing on the floor) ("Carl... I love you") 

"You," I whisper, pointing at the woman. "You took everything from me, you cold-hearted bitch."   
She fired a shot at me. The bullet slammed into my chest and exploded out my back. I walk   
forward, not feeling the pain.   
"You took my laughter." (Blue's bullet-riddled corpse lying on the ground) She squeezes another   
shot off. It strikes me in the stomach. No pain.   
"You took my love." (Joleen dying in my arms) (Her lifeless eyes staring at me sadly.) The   
Executioner pulls out a large knife and flings it at me. I bat it away like a mere fly. I look at Rajeem   
and see he is looking at the opened door, planning something.   
"He took my life away from me." (Rajeem putting the final bullet into my body) (A mixed feeling of helplessness and anger as I die.) ("Don't let them get away with this.")   
I see the skulled cowboy from my dream standing behind Rajeem and the Executioner.   
"Take them out of this life Carl," it commands. "Give them to me." I scream madly as I take the   
skulled cowboy's advice and charge at the Executioner.   
I embrace the Executioner in a bear hug as she whips out another gun and empties it into my torso.   
"Send Selena home Carl," the cowboy says to me. Still running, I slam Selena, the Executioner, into the wall and slowly peel her mask off. I kiss her on the lips sadly and look at her.   
"Here's a present for Micah," I say, drawing my hand back. "When you get to Hell, remind him what Family is." I slam my opened palm into Selena's chest, crushing her lung and heart. She looks at me with the same vacant glare Joleen did. But this time, I don't feel remorse. I only feel justice.   
"Splendid!!" Rajeem shouts, clapping his hands. I look at him and cock my head to one side.   
Rajeem sheds his long trenchcoat and withdraws a Japanese katana. Once, when I was alive,   
Rajeem's cut and chiseled body would have intimidated me. Now, however, there is only disgust.   
"Enough talk, Rajeem," I whisper, shedding the tattered shirt and pulling out the broadsword. "Let's finish the game."   
"You know why I came back. You read about it in 1989." My skeletally-thin form is roped with tight muscles. Rajeem looks at them, slightly impressed. I lower my head, hiding the scar on my neck.   
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," he passes off coldly, "some cop writes a book about some white boy that   
comes back from the dead and offs all the people that killed him and his woman. So fuckin' what??? It was   
a piece of crap story used to scare kids. It never happened." I whip my head up and stare at Rajeem. The scar on my neck calls out to him like a ghost. The patented "Oh-shit+ look of recognition is on his face.   
"Oh, it happened, Rajeem," I whispered, "it's happened since the dawn of time. It happened with   
Joshua RedHawk. It happened with Eric Draven. It happened with Iris Shaw. It happened with Ashe Corven. It even happened to me." Rajeem finally snaps his sword out and slashes across my belly. The wound heals quickly and I look at Rajeem.   
"Poor predictable Rajeem," I say as I whip the broadsword over my head, trying to split Rajeem's   
skull. He dives around the strike and I feel cold steel pass through my side, into my lung and thru my   
heart. I cough one time, sending a spray of blood out into the air. My jaw is covered with my lifeblood as Rajeem wrenches the sword out. There is a great deal of pain, but I block myself from it. I focus on Joleen. She's the reason I came back.   
Without thinking, I lift Rajeem over my head and press-throw him away from me. He slides across   
the room and comes to a stop at a broken coffee table. I feel the internal wounds closing up quickly, while the fleshwounds take slightly longer. I crouch on my sword and watch Rajeem stirring and rising to his feet.   
"Well, Slash," Rajeem says, grabbing a broken table leg and heading towards me. "There comes a   
time when everything fun has to end." I look at him, not able to guess what he has planned.   
"Y'know what, Slash ole buddy?" Rajeem asked, lifting the table leg high into the air. "Now is that   
time." He swings the leg and I brace for an impact that doesn't come. Instead, I hear something fly thru the air, and the crow squawking in pain. A blinding light blasts thru my head as I cry out and lift the sword. I'm still pretty weak from Rajeem running me thru, so I'm slow as shit coming out a long tube. Luckily for me, Rajeem is hurting too.   
"You brought me into this world of pain and hatred Rajeem," I scream as I feel the broadsword slide thru Rajeem's stomach. He makes a choked sound, almost like an 'Ook!!' as the blade passes thru   
his intestines and severs his spine. I carry the impaled ganglord across the room and pin him to a stud. I watch his body shake and tremble as his blood forms the shape of a crow on the floor below   
him.   
"And I'm taking us both out of it." I grab Rajeem's bald head and push it back. looking at him coldly.   
I steal the memories of him raping Joleen and fight back the tears. I turn my sorrow at being unable   
to help into a dark hatred.   
"Don't die yet Rajeem," I say queasily, "I have something to give to you. It was yours, but I took it   
and added something of my own." I place my second hand on Rajeem's face, right on his temple and   
project the contents of my mind into his. Rajeem starts to scream as loud as he can.   
"CAN YOU HANDLE THE PAIN?!?" I bellow over him. Rajeem's answer is a bloodcurdling   
shriek. I feed the memory of him forcing his dick into Joleen and throw in a dash of my own helplessness for seasoning.   
"YOU TOOK THINGS FROM ME THAT I WANTED, YOU FUCKING PIG!!!" I scream, my hatred growing and splitting into sadness also.   
"YOU TOOK MY JOLEEN AWAY FROM ME!!!" A fantasy of Joleen in a white dressslams through our minds. Every vein in Rajeem's eyes burst, turning his bright eyes a dark red.   
"YOU TOOK AWAY MY LAURIE!" I shout, giving him the painful memory of Laurie and I breaking up. Blood flows down Rajeem's face and onto the floor. The pool of crimson starts to form a crow-like shape   
"YOU TOOK AWAY MY DAUGHTER, YOU SON OF A WHORE!!!" The memory of me holding my baby daughter is what kills him. My sadness is too much for both of us to bear and with a final shriek of twisted agony, Rajeem dies. An ungodly amount of blood is pouring out of him. Not just from the 54-inch sword thru his stomach, but also from every bodily orifice.   
"And I took your life," I whisper, wrenching the sword out of the wall and both of us falling to the   
floor. I lie on the floor for a good thirty minutes. I just want to sleep, I am so tired. I feel someone touch my face and I open my eyes weakly. I see Joleen standing before me, she is wearing the white dress from my fantasy and caressing my face gently. She bends down and kisses me tenderly. I feel her peace and joy wash over me.   
"Joleen," I whisper, "I came back for you."   
"I know, Carl," she whispers softly as her long brown hair washes over my face. "I can't love you   
more for that. That was the most noble thing you or anyone else has done for me."   
I reach up and brush my lips across Joleen's. I feel peace wash over me as she caresses my face   
again.   
"Come on," she whispers, "it's time for us to go."   
"Where to?" I ask. "I stopped believing in that a long time ago."   
"To the docks, Carl," Joleen says, helping me rise to my feet. "Your parents, Laurie and your child   
are waiting. We need to leave now."   
Joleen leads me to the docks of the St. John's River in a little under an hour. When we get there, I   
see my parent's Taurus parked near the edge.   
Joleen and I walk to the Taurus and stop. I summon all my fading strength to stand with pride.   
I don't want the ones I love to see me as a weakling.   
Laurie steps out first, holding the baby. I pull them close to me and hold on tightly, not crushing the   
baby.   
"Don't go Carl," Laurie whispers, tears wetting my flesh. "Stay here. Stay with us."   
"I can't stay, Laurie," I whisper. "I don't belong here. You do. You need to raise our baby. Raise   
little Joleen up right. Tell her about her father. But don't tell her about.... this." Laurie turns from me, still holding the baby and crying.   
I watch my parent's step out of the Taurus and walk over to me. Gray hair is more prominent on   
them now and I see crow's feet reaching out from their eyes. They both embrace me tightly, almost breaking my bones.   
"Mom, Dad," I say, holding them close, "I have to go now. I finished everything I had to do. I can be happy now. I know that you'll help Laurie raise the baby up right. Goodbye." I turn around and look   
at my Joleen.   
"It's time to go, Carl," she says, holding out her hand. I reach out with my gloved hand and take hers.   
She leads me forward and I follow as we walk out over the water. The dawn sky breaks and a golden staircase forms in front of us. Joleen leads me up the staircase and I cast a final glance over my shoulder to the people I have left behind. I hope this staircase takes me where I belong....   
Fin 3/18/98   


The Crow: Love Past Death [an exclusive interview with author Carl Price] 

1) What the hell is wrong with you? I can barely understand the story!   
a) I wrote this story from the soul's point of view. And that soul happened to be me. If I was in this   
type of situation, I would react this way. So... I had my friends kill me and bring me back to life. 

2)Where did you get the idea for all these people?   
a) All the characters in LPD are real. Micah is my cousin, Selena is his ex-girlfriend. Blue is a doper   
I know. Laurie Spears is my exgirlfriend. Joleen is one of my best friends. Rajeem was a gang-leader I knew (he's dead now. AIDS took him). The others (Monster, Skinpuppy, Tiger, BooBear) were all nicknames for class mates of mine. 

3)What the hell were you on when you wrote this story?   
a) You know, usual stuff. Crystal Meth, Mary Jane, Acid, PCP, Codeine, Morphine, Smack. Nah, I   
was clean during the writing of this story. The pink elephants told me what to write. 

4)Any other story ideas, since this one sucked so much?   
a) Well, I got about a hundred ideas. I mean, I am plannin to be a writer. 

5)Any other Crow stories, since this one sucked so much?   
a) About three Crow stories. maybe a Crow/Spawn crossover. 

6)This story sucked alot, can you write better than that?   
a) SHUT THE HELL UP!!!! I GOT THE POINT THAT YOU DIDN'T LIKE THE STORY!!!   
NOW LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!!!!   
[at this point, the author of this story pulled out a .45 caliber and started firing at the reporter] 

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[][2]

  
  
  
  


   [1]: mailto:elbeaner@hotmail.com
   [2]: /or/crowffa/fanfic.html



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